Drunken Antics
by P is 4 Precious
Summary: The guys go out on their G.N.O. guys nite out . Drinks flow they burst out in song, hit on each other,drunk dial and well drink. Very funny


**A/N: I had an idea I needed to get out. Drunk people are funny especially guys so what happens at a bar I wondered, on a GNO (guys nite out).**

**Disclaimer: I dnt own Naruto but I wished cus I would be filthy rich.**

Outside Naruto's house

"Naruto, you asshole what took you so long?" said Chouji

"Sorry ok, I went on a date with Hinata earlier. I needed time to change"

"Whatever. Let's go" said Shikamaru starting the black SUV

Shikamaru put the van in reverse and pressed down on the acceleration. "My one night every week to get out and I spend it with you mor-"

"Wait!….. wait!. I wanna go too" A voice screamed from outside. The boys all whipped their heads to look outside and saw Sai running towards the van.

"Drive, drive, drive" said Naruto, "Come on floor it! Before he catches up"

"Hold on Im gonna see if I can run him over. That should give us some time" said Shikamaru accelerating in reverse

"Although I agree, we don't have time. We should go" said a velvety voice belonging to Sasuke.

"Your right, let's just go" Shikamaru agreed.

"Uhh" A few disappointed voices went out

Kiba turned on the radio and all the boys bobbed their heads to the hip hop beat the speakers blasted out.

The van pulled up to the bar and they all got out. Sasuke always expressed his annoyance with the place and thought it was a breeding place for stupid drunks.

"Tsk, this place is always full of idiots"

"Hey this is where I always come for a good time" Naruto defended

"Exactly"

"You know what, I'm tired of you Teme. Asshole" Naruto mumbled

"Dickhead" Sasuke counteracted

"Bitchass"

"Pussy"

"Tranny"

"Tightwad"

"Manwhore"

**A/N (Wow I never realized how difficult it is to think of offensive names. Whew I'm exhausted)**

"God can you guys stop. After all we're on holy ground "said Kiba. The doors of the bar opened to reveal a large room with TV screens mounted on every wall, liquors of every origin and men chugging beers and some smashing cans in their heads.

"Let it begin" said Deidara and the guys all hooted…except Sasuke of course, well maybe a little he had a smirk on his face. Although he hated the place these were his friends…unfortunately

_Few minutes later_

"Woooo… one more round Karen" shouted Kiba with beer splashing everywhere

"Now its time for the song"

"Ahh not the song" said Neji

"Yes the song…a-and we're gonna sing it. Count us off Naruto"

"Okey dokey. One, umm two, umm …ahhh what comes after two again " the blonde slurred to himself

"Three. you dobe,.. ugh why did I even say anything" the raven replied

"Yeah three"

"We are drunk, we are free,

Grab a drink, chug with me.

Get fucked up, that's the plan

Might throw up, in the van

Gonna drink, drink some more

Might just sleep, with a whore

We'll be alright….

Bottoms up, every last of it

On the floor, take a shit

Shave my hair, get tattoos

Steal some shit, make the news (_hi mom_)

We'll be alright….

Rum! (yeah)

Beer! (yeah)

Scotch! (yeah)

If a fight breaks out, gonna duck

Cus its guy time and we don't give a fuck

We'll be alright…."

**(I made this song up after another song Im proud. Don't steal it I'll fuck you up)**

The anthem ended and the drinks started to talk for the guys.

"To youth!" said Lee

"Yeah!" the drunks said in unison.

"Yeah" said a single voice seconds after.

All the guys turned their head to see Sai sitting there

"What the fuck are you?" said Naruto

"Hey you guys, I tried calling out to you but I guess you didn't hear me"

"Ohh yeah that must be it"

"You were?"

"When?"

"That's too bad"

**OoOoOoOoOoO**

"Sai you asshole, why are you touching my neck" shouted Naruto

"It's so smooth, what moisturizer do you use" slurred Sai

"You know what I don't get about women" said Kiba randomly. "All they do is nag you about stuff that you really don't give a fuck about"

"Temari's troublesome that way too" said a tipsy Shikamaru

"I mean w-when I come over, I -I came to hang with you not tell you my opinion on the drapes" He continued or more like stuttered

"Ooo, who's gotten the p-period excuse before for sex" asked Deidara chugging down more beer

"I!" the alcohol ridden guys replied

"Not me, Sakura's isn't due till in the next two weeks" replied a still energetic Lee

"Man, you're so screwed up" said Deidara

"Well after she started having it every week I did my research" Lee continued

"Neji went through that when Ten Ten was upset with him, right Neji?" asked Naruto

But there was no reply.

When the guys pulled out of their drunken chatter they realized that Neji and Sasuke had left and the note on the table told them it was at least an hour ago.

"Damn Teme" said a tomato red Naruto.

By this Shikamaru had drunk dialed Temari and was giving her a drunken speech on how much he loved her.

"Tem, I love you, you know that. I-I'm sorry for n-not going shopping with you. W-When I come over there I'll even t-talk about all you wanna-wanna talk about instead of falling a-asleep"

Temari's voice could be heard over the phone and a string of curse words came out and after all that Shikamaru only said "yeah b-but I love you ok". The phone went a little quieter and it seemed as if Temari said it back to shut him up.

Lee had gotten drunk and was walking on his hands through the whole bar, picking up shots with his mouth as he crossed over the counter. Deidara was hitting on a dude with long dark hair who he thought was a girl, whose back was turned.

"Hey baby, are you into art cus your body is a masterpiece"

The guy turned to face him and said

"Im a dude you know, you creep"

"Oh my bad dude yeah"

As soon as the guy turned his back to Deidara again he started hitting on him again.

"Hey baby, are you into art cus your body is a masterpiece"

A few moments passed and the guys were ready to go and started packing up and Deidara finally got the point after the dude hit him in the gut.

"Wait whose gonna drive if we're all drunk"

"I will" said a voice

"Who was that?"

"Me, you lowlife's" all the guys turned to the right to see Shino sitting there.

"Wait when did you get here?" asked Kiba

"Tsk, I drove here with you guys"

"Oh"

The guys piled in the van and drove off and few minutes into the journey "Wait where's Deidara?"

"Oh he said he was gonna show some girl what fine art is in the Bathroom?" said Shikamaru. "Dont worry. I dont think it's the dude he was hitting on"

_Meanwhile_

"YEAH" shouted Deidara

"Oh yes!"

"Am I the bomb or what"

"Mmm yes you are, don't stop"

"I won't Kerry yeah"

"It's Stacy"

"That's what I said"

**A/N: Well just a little something to lighten my mood .I'm so proud of my song. Review, review, review reading The Last Time and I'm beginning to think of another story idea. We'll see **


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